my hearts being squeezed by the bitchiness that is me.
Monday, July 31, 2006
sometimes its tiring.
oh so tiring.
but dunno why i keep at it.
anyways just now i cut my sisters hair.
BEFORE (like crap right?)
AFTER(not much diff but thinner and FRINGE!!)
so any takers for farah's hair salon?
anyways last night was at esplanade.
with sis and cousin.
strange twist of events really.
first was supposed to watch awallah dondang
at kreta ayer
but my stupid sister left her wallet in the cab.
so she had no tix.
then we ciaoed la.
took 124 to nearest stop possible.
along the way we stopped at magic wok
grabbed really nice food to eat.
and then ESPLANADE!
which typically was flooded.
so yeah pics!
fahimah and syafiqah(our cousin; fathers side)
both same age.
me, fahimah, syaf (and LIKE im the PRETTIEST)
hahhaahhaha
and me and syaf in front of fullerton.
i was looking shitty la..cos i was dressed for crap malay play
not nite at esplanade.
ala bryanboy....
shirt: converse, bag: dorothy perkins, crop cargos: dorothy perkins, slip on sandals: papillio by birkenstock
i'm a big Dorothy Perkins fan!
upper middle class clothes at quite an affordable price.
and plus haha the sizing!
im packing it in these days.
anyways..
bitch mode now.
sometimes talking to her is exhausting
really exhausting.
because i think of all the shits.
and i feel suffocated knowing that she moved on first.
bother.
but i try.
so give me credit for that.
all in all i enjoy talking to her.
so yeah.
exes should just be exed la.. thats my motto
but sometimes u have to face the fact that u have
to make exceptions.
sometimes.
--insignificant lies--
1:01 am
long hours of sleeping leads to body ache!!!!!
Friday, July 28, 2006
well the crappiest thing ever
finally learn to sleep before midnight
but have not achieved yet the art
of waking up earlier than nine am.
need to work on that.
anyways am now having major stomachache
my hunger got the best of me.
i ate cornflakes.
and now stomachache is worse.
cripes.
anyways have teambonding shit at 2pm.
hana says its fun.
cos she has been for the morning session.
im hoping what she says is true.
cos im pooped.
and i hate that kinda shit.
but im glad to know that i have
hana's sec sch fren ain in my group
so at least got a fren there..
heng!
well..
time to change i suppose
but im too lazy..
brr..
ladida...
--insignificant lies--
11:37 am
the late nights will never end
Thursday, July 27, 2006
bloody crap.
i really need to learn how to sleep early.
for gods sake!
anyways yeah..
a full day of briefing.
on modules.
and admin matters
and what to register for and all that.
and tmr the same shitholes.
todays briefing was from like 9-3pm.
and actually it was supposed to end at 5pm.
it was just a MIRACLE that the lecturers
kept it short and sweet.
so we ended at 3pm instead.
anyways..
tmr same shit. but 10-4
hopefull same thing where ppl talk less.
teach less, learn more ppl.
oooh and bryanboy might come to singapore!
the best!
--insignificant lies--
1:43 am
the end of a year.
Monday, July 24, 2006
arfan and alifah..mother and son.. =)
kakak angkat and adik angkat.. ;)
shiqin and filza.. the hot babes!
ala familia!!
me and hana.. biatch sistaz!!! LACE!
so fast.
it feels like only yesterday
that i stepped through the gates of woodgrove for the first time.
battling through the heat
the sweltering heat..
of that aftnn to meet for an induction.
first time.
i tot..what a dreary school.
gonna be a bunch of old farts.
matronly primary school teachers
like the kinds i used to have..
who wear talcum powder on their necks..
or keep their hair in thar ridiculous short do..with curls!
but who would have known i would meet so many beautiful ppl there
my gang..
all the rest..
kak mazlin..
hairani..
kamaliza..mumtaj..
kak sab..
kak sanisah..
suritha..
god tooo many to mention..
and now its gonna end..
but its nice to know i made some really close frens..
like hana..
me and that girl..
hard to seperate that bond..
i hope..
but..haha im confident..
we live less than 3 mins awaY!!!
if that still dun work then i dunno what to say..
but through all that..
it was worth it..
i tot i was wasting time.. wasting a year of my life..
but it made me clear as to what i wanna do..
i wanna be a teacher..
i wanna work hard and get a chance to be offered the deg..
and i met all these beautiful ppl
who have enriched my life..
and i love them.. so much..
all the best..
to all of us..
--insignificant lies--
10:04 pm
superficial confessions.
Sunday, July 23, 2006
my hair's all tied up now.
and im in my underwear.
wearing a blue racer back top.
typing incessantly once again.
and today my night was halted
ABRUPTLY
and i have nothing to say to that.
you might think im being pulled on a leash
and yeah i am.
because you dont know what its like
because life is harder for me with her.
when you have not experienced it
its best you dont tell me anything
or even laugh in jest.
even in jest.
because it hurts more when you guys dont understand.
its times like this that i feel like
its time to end all this bull shit.
because hey..
is it all worth it?
one moment of pleasure
for endless amounts of earth shattering
shards of words
slicing through you
would you?
im not strong enough
to handle all of this
because i've been taken
broken
abused and used.
and all i wish for now is to live
whatever else is remaining.
with my mind in focus.
my mind at ease.
i still love myself perhaps.
and i'm frigging emo. because i like it.
and thats the only way i know how to deal.
peace.
--insignificant lies--
1:54 am
the internet is proving to be another bore hole!
Saturday, July 22, 2006
well im off.
to go to where else but causeway pt.
take care.
--insignificant lies--
12:09 pm
in the centre of it all. there i stand.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
and im the main thing.
the main thing there.
standing.
all dolled up.
pretty and perfect.
--insignificant lies--
4:49 am
don't look back in anger. i heard u say.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
well thats the song thats playing now.
im freakingly bored..
well..
i dunno..
feel empty in a way.
like.. hur? whats there left to say..??
i'll just drop it all.
drop all the balls im juggling in the air
and let everything fall to pieces?
i miss u khai.
where are u when i need to analyse shit?
when i need to talk about all these things
bearing down on me..
as it is..su's not in singapore.
fuck it.
cigarettes ..
soon to be my only friend.
hi..meet ciggies ..
=)
argh fuck it la.
nothing else to say.
nights.
--insignificant lies--
12:33 am
seven years. my vampiric nature supercedes itself.
Saturday, July 15, 2006
well at first i had a lot of things to say
but now i dont feel like saying em.
so just look at the pictures and enjoy.
femme quest 2006.
and some new ppl i met.
isyah and johan =)
nice and cute people.
oh and if u see a girl that looks like patricia mok
thats actually one of the contestants! Johan's in love with her!!
and the last pic was done by isyah. i just stole it frm her.
--insignificant lies--
12:47 pm
two late nights out. sleeping at dawn.
thursday night went for femme quest.
will post about that later
when im awake and sane!
just now went karaoke with hana and husni, her bf.
sang and sang
and now im melancholy.
i feel like that 16 year old girl again
struggling with her sexuality..
in love with a woman who would never love her back
i'm like that all over again.
its amazing how just one thought
or one feeling can change your mood and attitude
for the day..
im beginning to think
fuck this men..
who am i kidding?
i know in my hearts of hearts
what is it that i want
and i want it badly..
but maybe i'm selling myself short..
god knows.
but life gives u shit sometimes..
and u just have to swallow the shit
as gross as it sounds..
see this is why when u karaoke
dont sing sad songs
esp not songs that speak so true
peace.
loves.
--insignificant lies--
5:45 am
1 wedding, 2 drunkards, 1 crazy class and $426 worth of products!
Thursday, July 13, 2006
first the wedding.
it was on sunday.
didnt have time to blog abt it til now.
anyways my fren sham accompanied
me to the wedding because
all my other frens who were going ie. intan and farah
came with bfs..
so i brought him along..
anyways we all squeezed in farah's dad's car.
farhan, her bf, was driving.sham sat in front.
the rest of us squeezed at the back in agony.
anyways it was a nice wedding.
it was irma's brother's wedding.
god so many apostrophes!
i like the pelamin.or pedestal.
all white with white roses.
took some pics in the toilet of all places!!!
intan, me and farah
then monday night.
after italy winning the world cup!!!
haha...
went to al-ameen with hana and her bf, husni.
she treated us to really good food
then husni left
and we both got messages from the exes
that was really disappointing
and altogether saddening
and we kinda like reflected on all the shit.
and we ended up being all melancholy
drinking long island teas at the playground behind her place
we kind got tipsy.
check out the pink lips.
then we had to pee.
and we hahaha.. went to this stairwell of this block
and just peed
we wanted to pee at the grass near the playground
but there were these two mats there..
talking
so we had to go stairwell.
it was crazy!!
then went back playground and talked some more
and sang sad songs
and talked crazy!!!
LICK ME!!!
hahahha.. anyways we took a vid
after the whole peeing thing
which raihana confessed that haha
she saw my butt
and i asked her how it was..and she said.. its big!
haha
thanks a lot hana!
so anyways..
tuesday.. the tch that took over my ex form class
had to go for her graduation convocation
so i took over them again
it was nice.. and sweet
they were so happy to see me.
they got excited.
but im also reminded haha of how much stress they gave me
that i had to smoke my lungs out!
but i took a pic of them!!!
cept qing xin was absent la..
oh wellz..
so cute right?
gonna miss them to bits..
and today
after getting my pay.
i finally bought clarins.
some might say im blowing my money
but my face feels good.
and dry and matte.
i spent $426.
this is the basics.
(L-R) facial wash ($36),
purifying toner for super oily skin($38),
day moisturizer with spf20($87),
and night cream for skin rejuvenation($105)
then i bought this total protection value pack
which costs me $160
but it comes with a lot of things..
(L-R): whitening essence, gentle exfoliator,
extra sun protection moisturiser spf40,
intensive whitening mask, oily skin mask,
and a lifting cream to maintain skin countour
pretty good right?
and thats not all..
i got a whole lot of goodies!!
(L-R): hydrating lotion, combination/oily skin toner,
hydrating mask, cleansing milk, cleasing toner,
body lotion for contouring, liquid foundation sampler,
lipstick sampler.
hahah and now!!!
i'm clarins-fied.
look at my collection.
beautiful ain't it?
love it. =)
and now that i've retailed therapied im happy.
oh and yeah i bought two bras.
haha one pink and one maroon.
shiok. =)
nights..
work again tmr.
workshop at 9.30am!
--insignificant lies--
12:22 am
ITALY !!!! pasta..lasagna..pizza.. aglio olio..hahaha
Monday, July 10, 2006
FREAK IT!!!
ITALY ARE THE WORLD CUP CHAMPS!
hahahha stupid france..
zidane scores a penalty in the 7th minute.
then materazzi scores with a header
in the 19th minute..
fabulous that one was.
i was leaping.
hahaha..
game was pretty average from then on
then extra time.
by the half of the extra time
henry was subbed out..
and stupid zidane
just had to go and get himself a red card.
i love that man(zidane)
but god really man..
what the commentator said was right.
he really tarnished his career with that one
and its so unexplainable what he did.
i still dun get it!!!
why the hey did he have to head butt
materazzi..
whats that all about??
god..!!!!
if not maybe during the penalty shootout..
things would have been diff..
anyways..
penalty shoot out..
italy scored everything.
france missed one..
by some guy..grisbol or something or rather..
anyways the last person
to shoot for italy was
grosso
kinda all depended on him.
haha and boy did he deliver..
=)
beautiful goal.
haha my mom woke up just now
just to hear me screaming my head off
hahahhaa..
and she was like who won?
haha and i was like
ITALY!!!!!
--insignificant lies--
5:00 am
air con better. town with shar for the first time! n happy bday bapak!
Sunday, July 09, 2006
well my air con is good now.
crazy bugger..
so finally i met up with shar..
after like how many months of knowing her?
almost a year already sia i know her i thinks..
met up at orchard mrt.
peed like crazy.
then went to scotts coffee bean.
her fren runni works there.
so the drinks were on the house!
shiok.
had chicken pasta
and choc muffin on her.
thank you shar.. so sweet.. =)
look at that.. member fierce sia!
makan pasta also looks like wanna makan orang
and haha she never fails to touch her hair!!!
enough already girl.
you're hot..
haha no need to make yourself more and more hotter..
esp more hotter than ME!!!
hahah see she's cam whoring again..
okok.. i joined in..
TADA!
my face like wanna sleep sia..
and ok.. i don't get it..
look at the picture below.
whats the point of putting this
ridiculously big umbrella or
whatever u call it.. pontoon is it?
god knows..
in an indoor coffee bean???
is it like gonna rain?
is it so sunny?
or is it just gonna snow?
hur hur???!
anyways we met hedz and her gf yan
and they joined us for a bit.
at that time when they came me and shar
already started making a chart out of the ppl we know.
and it only takes four ppl to connect me and her!
god can u believe it!
hahaha small world sia..
fuck..
anyways i took a picture of the chart
but sorry its mucho confidentialo..
no peeko of the charto.
sorryo..
haha..
was trying to make the chart look like this..
well anyways u figure out the names urself..
:P
after the whole chart thing..
we smoke outside tangs for a bit..
we being- runni, hedz, yan, shar and me.
and i thought them how to tell which girls are virgins
and who are not..
so we spent a couple of long minutes
checking out girls backside.
hedz is a virgin.
haha truth be told all of them
are goldSTARS except me..
im a tainted STAR..
bugger..haha
anyways we went out seperate ways
me and shar went to heeren to shop..
haha walked and walked..
and we decided to try on expensive clothes and take pics of it..haha
LOOK! a hello kitty top.
it says... no photos please..
haha very obligatory papparazzi..
this girl tried on this roxy shirt
which of course I recommended..
haha fell in love with it of course and she bought it..
when just prev she bought a germany converse t
hahahhaa
the powers of persuasion
by me..
:P
and more and more cam whoring..
hahhaahaha
we took a fag first..
by the mrt..
and then my left arm started
being numb again
like as if theres no blood circulation
and i was like thats it.. stopped 3/4
of the way thru..
fuck man..
something wrong with me
anyways yeah...
cam whore cam whore
behind the store..hahaha..
cute?
innocent?
or just pathetically sad?
FIERCE!
GRRR....
retards.
from zulu.
bryan boy????
and a last one for the road...
peace!
and of course goin home on the train
i had to check myself out.
hahaha
left town about 7.30
met my family at cwp.
for birthday dinner.
my dad's birthday yesterday
the 7th!
ate CRAYFISH PASTA!!!
yum yum
had salad.
had calamari rings..
had ice cream
had pizza..
god..
pig..
hahhaa
all in all..
a really really..
nice day..
shar need to meet up soon
haha this time u can follow me shop..
hahahhaha..
and i'll treat u to a choc muffin..haha
or whatever la u want.. ;)
good day.
--insignificant lies--
12:14 am
